Dreaming about your crush: the short answer
Dream interpretation is not prediction and not diagnosis. This article separates what sleep research observes from what popular interpretation associates with the theme, always saying which is which.
Dreaming about your crush does not mean they feel the same way, that they are thinking about you, or that something is going to happen between you. The dream shows your side of the story: the interest, the hope, the fear of rejection and what you imagine about this person. Whoever takes up a lot of your thoughts during the day tends to show up at night.
A crush, here, is someone you are interested in but are not yet in a relationship with. If you are already a couple, the reading is in the article about a boyfriend or girlfriend; if it is someone you barely know, see dreaming about someone. If you have a crush on a celebrity, read dreaming about a celebrity.
Read also: Dreaming about your boyfriend or girlfriend and Dreaming about a kiss.
Why your crush shows up in dreams so often
The continuity hypothesis (Schredl and Hofmann, 2003) explains the basics: dreams follow what occupies waking life, and a new crush occupies a lot of it. You reread the chat, check their stories, imagine conversations in the shower, notice every detail. That daytime rehearsal becomes raw material for the night. A 2021 study on partners in dreams started from the same idea: since romantic relationships are an important part of life, the loved one should appear often in dreams, and indeed they did.
The dream also affects the next day. Dylan Selterman and colleagues followed people in relationships and found that dreams about a partner, such as scenes of jealousy or infidelity, were linked to more conflict the following day. The study was done with couples, not crushes, but the lesson holds: the emotion of the dream can color your mood and the way you treat the person. A good dream can make you bolder; a bad one, more withdrawn, without anything having really happened.
Sources: Schredl and Hofmann, Continuity between waking activities and dream activities, Consciousness and Cognition, 2003; Schredl and Wood, Partners and ex-partners in dreams, Clocks & Sleep, 2021; Selterman and colleagues, Dreaming of You, Social Psychological and Personality Science, 2014.
Common scenes in dreams about a crush
| Scene | What usually goes with it |
|---|---|
| Kissing your crush | A wish for closeness, wanting to know whether the interest is mutual |
| Your crush confessing their feelings | Wanting to be chosen, insecurity about making the first move |
| You confessing your feelings | Courage that has not left the drawing board yet, rehearsing a conversation |
| Your crush ignoring you | Fear of rejection, mixed signals in real life, low self-esteem |
| Your crush with someone else | Jealousy, comparison, fear of being too late |
| A calm date, holding hands | A wish for calm and company, idealizing what could be |
If your crush is from work or school, also read dreaming about work or your boss and dreaming about school. If jealousy was at the center, see dreaming about betrayal.
See also: Dreaming about your ex getting married and Dreaming about someone you haven't seen in years.
When the dream about your crush starts to weigh on you
Dreaming about your crush is common and almost always harmless. It deserves attention when the dream turns into fuel for anxiety: you wake up and spend the day waiting for a message, read every like as a sign or make decisions based only on what you dreamed. The flutter you feel the next day is real (see why we get butterflies in the stomach), but the story in the dream is yours.
A simple rule helps: treat the dream as information about you, not about the other person. If your interest is serious, the answer lies in a waking conversation, respecting the other person's timing and wishes. If rejection, real or imagined, leaves you sad for weeks or disrupts your sleep, talking with someone you trust or with a psychologist makes a difference.
Freud, Jung and faith on the crush
In Freud's psychoanalysis. For Freud, once the work of interpretation is complete, "the dream is the fulfillment of a wish". The dream about a crush seems to confirm the line effortlessly: the kiss, the confession, the perfect date. But he pointed out that wishes usually come in disguise, and that there are counter-wish dreams. The crush who ignores you in the dream may also be serving some wish, such as having a reason to give up or not taking the risk.
In Jung's psychology. In Man and His Symbols, Marie-Louise von Franz describes the projection of the anima, in men, and of the animus, in women: the inner image of the other sex is cast onto a flesh-and-blood person, who then seems perfect. In the Jungian reading, the crush in the dream may partly be that image, with qualities you admire and perhaps also want to develop in yourself.
In symbols and faith. In the Song of Songs, a refrain appears more than once: "that ye stir not up, nor awake my love, till he please" (Song of Songs 2:7). Many readers of faith see in it a counsel of patience: letting affection ripen in its own time, without forcing it.
Bringing both readings together. Research shows why your crush appears; Freud, Jung and faith help you ask what this interest says about you. No reading turns the dream into an answer from the other person.
Sources: Freud, Die Traumdeutung, 1900; Jung (ed.), Man and His Symbols.
Your crush in dream books
O Livro dos Sonhos, a Brazilian dream book by L. P. Baçan, has no entry for crush, a word Brazilian Portuguese only recently borrowed from English. The closest ones are boyfriend (in life, social prestige; in love, problems) and kiss (in life, new friendships; in love, news). These are readings from tradition, with no connection to your story.
Man and His Symbols goes in the opposite direction from these books: for Jung, dreams are individual, and their symbols cannot be catalogued as in a dictionary.
Sources: L. P. Baçan, O Livro dos Sonhos, 2014; Jung (ed.), Man and His Symbols.
What folk belief says about dreaming of your crush
In folk belief, dreaming about your crush is often read as a sign that they are also thinking about you, and a kiss as romance on the way. A crush who ignores you would be a dream by opposites, announcing that you will get closer; a crush with someone else, a nudge not to wait too long to act. Some say that dreaming about the same crush for many nights is a sign of a connection between souls; if that is your case, read dreaming about the same person over and over. These are folk beliefs, fun to share, and not predictions. See what dream meanings look like according to science and culture.
Sources
- Schredl M, Hofmann F. Continuity between waking activities and dream activities. Consciousness and Cognition, 2003. https://doi.org/10.1016/S1053-8100(02)00072-7
- Schredl M, Wood L. Partners and Ex-Partners in Dreams: A Diary Study. Clocks & Sleep, 2021; 3(2): 289-297. https://doi.org/10.3390/clockssleep3020018
- Selterman D et al. Dreaming of You: Behavior and Emotion in Dreams of Significant Others Predict Subsequent Relational Behavior. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 2014. https://doi.org/10.1177/1948550613486678
- Freud S. The Interpretation of Dreams (Die Traumdeutung), 1900. Project Gutenberg. https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/66048
- Jung CG (ed.). Man and His Symbols, 1964. Portuguese edition consulted: O homem e seus símbolos, Nova Fronteira/HarperCollins Brasil. https://www.skoob.com.br/book/8435
- Baçan LP. O Livro dos Sonhos (Brazilian dream book). Self-published, 2014.
Frequently asked questions
Does dreaming about my crush mean they are thinking about me?
No. That is a folk belief. The dream reflects your thoughts and feelings, not the other person's.
Why do I dream about my crush so much?
Because they take up a lot of your thoughts during the day. According to the continuity hypothesis, what stays on your mind tends to come back at night.
What does it mean to dream that I kissed my crush?
It usually goes with a wish for closeness and curiosity about whether the feeling is mutual. In folk belief, it is a sign of romance. It is not a prediction.
I dreamed my crush was ignoring me. Is that a bad sign?
No. The scene usually reflects fear of rejection or mixed signals from real life. In folk reading, it is even taken as a dream by opposites.
What is the spiritual meaning of dreaming about your crush?
For some people of faith, it is an invitation to be patient and to let affection ripen in its own time. It is a faith reading, without proof.
